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I think the Santa Clause phenomenon, as I heard it called before,  is related to several aspects of the inter-racial, cross-class relationship.  Most of us from the "enlightened" places for the most part see one another as people first, who happen to be of such and such a culture second.  Whereas many people who have a different background, have a stronger identification with their tribe, and secondarily with the rest of humanity.

Another aspect is that many people here are essentially beggars, and they're happy to have you buy them a meal, or to buy them meals indefinitely.  They don't care whether you're a foreigner or a neighbor or uncle, whatever.  The local people who are rich - or even who have a meager-paying job - have to deal with this all the time: if they aren't firm with self-protecting what is in their wallet, they'll be penniless in no time.

As for the lack of verbal appreciation, I have gotten worked up about that quite a few times myself.  My wife is getting better about saying thank you and even insisting her family say thank you if we give them something - but it took my repeated insistence upon it to make that happen, and so I've also had to some extent to try to let go of my expectation of it.  I can't say I've got any of these things solved or resolved or anything, because a hair short of two years into our marriage we still confront them daily - especially when we're around other local people - which is one of the main reasons I had to fire each of the helpers we tried to employ - just a bad influence.

Because it's "against the rules" to be clear about one's boundaries, desires, and expectations in a "modern relationship" sense, most Westerners I think deal with this by having a strict budget, and whether they lie about it or are really limited to X dollars per day/week/etc, they stick to it strictly and it's always the "end of the week, etc" and there's "just 200 pesos left for lunch".  Those who don't figure out how to set boundaries, obviously can't last because the expenses keep escalating and even the richest one goes broke.

For my part, and on my budget, I'm ok with treating people a little - a toothbrush or sandals for my wife's sister or brother, ample food from cheap eateries for her immediate family when they visit occasionally.  I am fairly firm that my generosity does not extend beyond minor items and that it does not extend to extended family.

I remember before I met my wife that I quickly decided to be firm when meeting someone for the first time - I told them in advance that they could at most bring one friend or family member.

I suspect that with enough patience of meeting enough people, a person would meet a filipina who is appreciative, if that is a top criteria.  Although I really don't know for sure.